happy birthday aidah

woo-hoo!

another bubbly girl just turned 19.

happy birthday aidah bedah!

aidah is a very cute petite floorballist with a huge gigantic heart.
she makes you smile everytime you're down.
a really trustworthy girl with a great sweet smile.

keep on smiling girl,
have fun on your special day!

take care,
*hugs*

happy birthday suliza!

*humming a birthday tune*

suliza, today is your special day huh? *winks*

happy 19th birthday palsie!

have a great day today as it only happens once every 365 days.
hope it will be filled with joy, laughter and happiness!
i'm soooo looking forward to meet you and shikin!
and meeting someone (the boy) not the man.
haha.

and i'm glad to be at the phone with you wishing you, singing you a birthday song.
woo-hoo! i'm the first!
haha.

i hope you will like the present.
no, not like.
you should love it. haha.
i know it's not much but it's from my heart.

suliza dearest,

do you realised how long we have been friends?
6 years gone so fast.
and i cherished every moment of it.

at times, i may be very harsh to you.
and it doesn't mean that i hate you.
it's just that i'm so concern about you.
i know you will understand.

seriously, i've learnt a lot about you since the last 6 years.
am still learning.
you are forever etched in this heart of mine.
you will always be my best friend.
you mean so much to me.

even by typing this,
i am drove to tears.

i can never imagine life without you.
i love you.

a little something for you.

all the tears and laughters we shared,
i owe it to you.
all the late night phone calls till the wee morning,
i owe it to you.
all the ideas you gave me,
i owe it to you.
all the little squabbles and achivements,
i owe it to you.

thanks for being part of my life.
keep on rocking my life!

we!rd dRe@m...

i had a weird dream on saturday afternoon.
was taking a quick few hours 'nap'.
and was awoke by a real felt dream.
i felt myself awake from that person in the dream.
in short, it was so real.
the dream stirred lots of emotions.
frustration, sadness, ego, happiness, funny, freedom, frighten, hatred.
i felt how angry i was, how stubborn i was.

the dream started with me having an argument with my mom.
a big argument, both shouting at each other.
the stubborn-ness between the two of us are really strong
both that doesn't want to admit defeat.
both refused to give in.
i hate having fight with my mom.
i can't stand that hatred feeling.
i'm evil at times.

the dream doesn't stop there.
i, then, can't take it anymore.
decided to jump down.
that's what i told her.
"i'm commiting suicide"
she replied "go on"
she just sat there and continue doing her stuffs.
not believing me.

i think i was lacked of attention and wanted to make myself heard.
i guess i wanted her to believe me that i meant every word i said.
so i sat at the window plane.
and jumped down.
but too bad, it's just one level down.
from the bedroom window, i felt down to the balcony.
it's pathetic lar.
btw, it happened at a semi-detached house.
so i didn't die.

then, something struck me to jump down from the balcony of the 5th level.
again, it's a semi detached house, 5 x 2 = 10.
10 storeys high.
i remember sitting at a tall height.
my dad trying very hard to soothe me.
but to no use.

i jumped down.
and my mind was interrupted by a message.
my mind was functioning like a computer.
on the top left hand corner, it stated:
"it will take 2 hours to process it"
i wondered how could someone thrown out of a 10 storey height took 2 hours to die?
it will just take less than 20 sec to process it lar.
not only that, the funny part was,
i'm able to choose how i wanted the end process it to be.
i had a touch on screen on my mind,
that shows different positions: do i want my left arm to be up, or do i want to bend my right leg.
it shows different facial expressions too: smiling, frowning, expressionless and etc.
i can choose whether i wanted to stay detach or stay intact.
weird lar.
if only there is the undo button.

then i arise from that horrible dream.
and reflected.
and i cried thinking about it.
it felt so real.
it scared me so much.

and you smsed me.
i'm glad you did.
cause i need you at that time.
thanks.
i'm so loving my reality.

bL!55...

my morning was beautiful.
as blissfulness filled me.
all thanks to you.
just by hearing your voice.
*whispers* btw, i love that 'wake-up' voice.

thinking how lucky i am now,
it got me pondering.
if ever, something got between us,
how will we react?
what will we do?
i'm a coward.
i'm seriously scared of losing you.

what did you do to have such an impact on me?
i really have no idea.
it just happened.
*winks* magic perhaps?
or maybe that 'voltage' eyes of yours?

i can't get through a day without having you in my mind.
i've always see you not only as a person,
but as an encouragement, a confidant, a joker.
someone who never fails to brighten up my day.
you're my driving force that propels me.
never once that i don't look forward in meeting you.
i've never been this comfortable with someone before,
*ehem* this exclude my bestfriends and family members.
welcome to the gang!
haha.
and this is another part of why i'm scared of losing you.
see how those above people are important to me?

i wouldn't want to put my hopes too high.
it will just reward me with disappointment.
what ever happens, happened.
things doesn't happened without a reason.
like why plants take in carbon dioxide (instead of oxygen) to photosynthesize.

for now, let's help each other out to
*smiles*
be a better person.

i love you.
not only as a friend.
but as a special friend.
and of course, as an individual.

h@ppy, j0yfuL...

weeeee!
goodness, i did have fun on monday with two of my dearest bestfriends.
great! i love both of you.
thanks for the endless fun, those laughters that makes my worries away.
and i love people looking at us *winks* haha.
cause we're a bunch of gundu heads who enjoy life.
or maybe we have this chemistry that is too strong for people to resist. *winks, winks* haha.
i love the trip home in the train.
*ehem* we're the centre of attention again.
what can i say?
irresistable.
haha.
thanks palss.

good influence is a benefit.
bad influence is a curse.
you can have lots of friends.
but not all are quality friends.
quality is way better than quantity.

and not forgetting, i love you too. *woops*
aww man, i can just literally melt looking at your face that kept on smiling the whole night.
i can never forget that look.
the way you smile and your dimple sets in.
that sparks i see in your eyes.
really, it felt good to see you smile and seeing you in that mood.
seeing and knowing you're happy, makes me at ease.
the time period was short, yet it has quality.
i enjoyed every second of it.
thanks.
i've enjoyed every ups and downs with you.
you are never alone.
you can always count on me.
i miss you still.

feeL...

those bad days don't affect how i feel for you.
sorry.
you got to try harder.
enjoy shooting, just don't push yourself too hard.

re5+...

it's been 10 months and still counting since i've been single.
well, i can't deny the last break up was hard.
but hey, it's a blessing in disguise.
seriously, it is.
it's not like i'm not been moving on with life since the last relationship,
in fact, i am moving on with a great mindset.
people do asked me "why aren't you in a relationship?"
it's a question that keeps me thinking about it, a lot.
and i come to a conclusion.
to me, being in a relationship is when the couple is really serious about each other.
madly in love with each other is not enough cause you may never know it will fade away. (take for example jennifer aniston and brad pitt)
it's when both of you decide that you wanna spend the whole life with each other.
accepting each other's flaws and compromising.
now, in modern times, people are abusing it.
some are in a relationship due to peer pressure.
some just need someone to make out with.
some may just want to show off or perhaps boost their egos to their friends.
some need the extra attention.
and some think that, i love you, you love me and then we should get into a relationship.
there are endless reasons.
sometimes, i can't get it.
in the sense that when those people who are in a relationship said to each other.
"if you found a better guy/girl, i'll let you go."
on the first place, if you are indeed serious about your boyfriend/girlfriend, why should you look around for other people?
so does it mean like i'm holding on to you till you found the one?
if people get their mindset correct about relationship,
there wouldn't be break-ups, there wouldn't be divorce.
these occurs when couples are unfaithful to each other.
or maybe due to financial problems or etc.
but being together you are supposed to hang in there, go through together.
not divorce, not breaking up.
those are just lame excuses, to free themselves, to free from the partner's burden.
abusing won't happen if the fella loves you.
who will beat up a loved one?
unless the person is insane.
true love conquers everything.
having 2 failed relationship, it makes me realised more.
i wasn't thinking.
i was fooled by those 'love bugs'.
thinking about it, i realised how gullible i am.
but now, i'm more aware and know what i want from it.
looking long term now.
no more short term.
that's why i'm still single.
about the available part.
hmmm.
go figure.

i'm enjoying life now. *grinning widely*
well, i've always been enjoying life.
going through the ebbs and flows of living.
it's amazing to see how we mature through those experiences.

imagine your life is perfect, without any set backs.
i don't think you will see a need in life.
cause you have everything.
you don't have to earn it.
and on top of it, your life in earth doesn't do you good.
you will tend to go through every day mindless.
you having all the money in the world, having girls/guys going gaga over you, people look up upon you, flawless, etc.
and i bet you will still complain and whine.
human nature.

i love the fasting month,
it's a period of time when gaps are being mend.
able to spend time as a whole family, in spite the busy schedules.
a time when i learnt more about myself.
when i can improve on believing in myself.
and of course, alhamdulillah, the food has been great!
neighbours keep on bringing food over.

i love mama in. haha
oh btw, she's my aunt.
i'm gonna do the swiss roll cake again with her guide.
even though i did it last year with suliza,
i still have yet to pass the rolling procedure. haha.
and mama in's house was in a mess lar due to the two clumsy girls.
seriously, since the past two years, i'm addicted to that rainbow swiss roll cake.
as the name suggest; rainbow, the colours are really attracting and it just make me want more of it.
i've always been the one finishing it up.
i'm thinking about it now. yum yum. *drools*
*oops* i'm fasting.

yeah-ness, gonna get a new stick today!

had a good chat with my sis before dozing off.
i just love that moment.
those late night chit-chatting period.
when we just unwind ourselves in the dark.
recalling the shows we watched, cartoons we saw.
sang songs together, laughed our head off.
talked about families, our childhood and everything you can imagine.
but all topics are nc-16. haha.
i had a great time.

i found a reason to stay at home in the morning.
cause there is a comedy on channel 5.
every weekdays at 1100 hrs.
it's entitled, The Golden Girls.
trust me, you will have a good laugh.
i so am hooked on it.
try watching one episode, or maybe just a few minutes.

i miss hanging out with suliza.
we'll meet up one day to catch up.

i miss hanging out with shikin.
just take care pal.
i hope you're not stressing yourself.

i miss hanging out with sakeenah.
we will go out one day.
haha.

i miss hanging out with you.
i guess you know.

to you:
i go through every day with a smile. but only you, can make me smile smile.
keep on surprising me, boy. *cheeky smiles*
no words are able to describe how i feel about you.
only my heart knows.
loving you is an asset.

re+re@+...

honestly, i don't know what to talk about.
there seems to be nothing.
or maybe there's just too much stuffs to talk about.

oh yes, now i remembered.
woke up by a sms.
i was still in a groggy mode and it took me a while to realise that it was my results.
alhamdulillah.
even though i've been slacking, i'm pretty happy with the results.
well, wasn't that satifised at first.
but thinking about it, it's over and i don't have any regrets or some sort.
overall, i'm pleased and suprised with the results.
a new alphabet has been added to my grade list.
my first time getting C.
2 Cs, a C and a C+.
i'll make sure the lowest that i could go is a C.
and the maximum of Cs for the whole 3 years is only 3.
was suprised that i've an ad for one of the modules.
cause i really don't understand what the questions were asking for.
and that papers carries 40% of the overall marks.
the other 60% which comes from practicals and a mini project which wasn't well done either.
i bet sakeenah won me in the 60%.
maybe.
whatever it is, i've got a distinction!
haha.

had a match with tp yesterday.
it was then i realised that my stick was so 'flexible'.
in other words, it is not for used.
it has broke into two.
wasn't playing well.
it seems that i was lacked of energy.
the team did good, won, 1-0.

i love today, espcially in the morning.
*grins*
i'm falling in evol with uoy all over again.

c@mp @nd f@5+!n9...

congrats to the organizers and the participants of the floorball training camp!
indeed, it was a great success!
even though it was our first try, it was good.
it went according to plan without any glitches.

i had fun and enjoyed myself.
learnt more about my teammates.
all of them has unique characters.
which i'm willing to dig more of it.
thanks for adding the joy to my life!
thanks all for your active enthusiasm for the games!
*grinning*
i was entertained by the games especially when it comes to the final two girls and a guy.
had fun laughing about that.

during the camp,
i can't deny that it drained all of my energy away.
am so worn out.
i need to improve on my stamina.
*chants* mind over body.

learnt good stuffs from the camp.
especially regarding the shots.
endurance is important.
patience is required.
nothing is impossible.

to my personal point of view,
overall, i think i did ok.
quite impressed with myself actually.
scored 1 goal against the sim.
assisted 1 goal.
wooooo-hoooooo!
it felt good cause i don't think i ever scored in a game.
am striving harder.
score:
won, 5-1. (sim)
lose, 0-1. (smu)
mind you, the game was within the same day.
we had like only 90 mins of resting.
everyone was on sleeping and tired mode.
but we managed to wake up.
and fight till the end.
i'm so proud of the girls!
keep it up.

ramandan commences.
and so does the fasting season.
to all muslims, happy fasting month.

on the 3rd
watched corpse bride with suliza,
hmmm... it was ok ok.
cute.
as usual, it was like a picnic area in the cinema.
both brought in food and kept on munching away.
nachos, burgers, fries, coke, ben and jerry's chocolate fudge brownie ice cream.
weeeeeee.....
fun!

grandma went back yesterday.
it is good to have her back.
someone to listen me crap.
had a good talk as usual.
and discovered some interesting details.
haha.
how lucky can i be?
*ponders*

and yes, we're not weirdos
we're special!
haha.
*cough, cough*

to you:
i miss you.
really do.
it was really good to hear from you.
no matter what, you're still cute. (points to your hair)
haha.
continue making me smile. =)