when i woke up this morning,
i realised that i am sobbing.
my tears were overflowing,
so it means that i was sobbing for quite sometime.
i dreamt about losing my mother and the partner.
i was utterly sadden by the thought of it that i can't help but to weep.
in the dream,
my mother was shot and before she left me,
holding her in my hands,
having blood flowing on my hands,
we managed to exchange our last words which ended with 'i love you ma'
out of sudden i was in another scene.
this time the partner was dead.
i can't take it.
having 2 loved ones dead within a short span of time.
in the dream,
i've tried living my life with the partner gone,
it was really hard adjusting to that life.
my days and nights were filled with cries.
my bestfriend, my soul mate, my everything is gone.
i have nothing,
just an empty soul,
an lifeless body.
if the partner is gone,
i don't have the best person
to talk to,
to tease,
to complain to,
to joke with,
for company.
i don't know how to cope if ever that happened,
i could just cry without any warning
because every minute would remind me of him.
both the partner and i did talked about parting.
and we realised that the only way for us to part is through death.
because we truly love each other and we believed that we can't find another better person for us.
the partner has been a very impactful person in my life.
and i can't describe how much he really means to me because it's endless.
those who are in love should know what i mean.
treasure the moments and your loved ones.
honey,
i want you to know that i love you very much,
and i will do anything within my means to make your life meaningful.
i can't bear to lose you sweetheart.
and if god takes you from me,
please let Him gives me the strength to move on in life and perhaps let me be your wife in heaven.
because i didn't get enough to shower you with my love on earth.
you are my true love.
i want to be with you forever,
till eternity.
